When your heart breaks open it’s an indescribable experience. It’s almost impossible to put into words. Almost, I say because there’s a book that did an amazing job doing just that. I’ll tell you a little about that book plus I’m going to share a story about how the Divine helped me get to this new level of heart opening. Both are oh so beautifully tied together.
It began with little Sacred Messengers showing up in my life, like bread crumbs leading to the ginger bread house of greater insight and love. They started appearing in response to a request I had made. I had asked my Divine helpers to help me experience a deeper connection with the Divine and all that is. But, other than what I’d already been doing (praying, meditating, journaling, self REiki, etc.), I wasn’t sure how to go about it. So I gave it over to them.
It Begins with Heart Healing Surprises
Shortly there after, I was inspired to purchase Heart Healing Flower Essences by Botanical Alchemy (I sell this locally for $17, the same price as on their website). I started taking 7 drops in the morning and the evening. And, boy did that create a few surprises!
I started having dreams about my former husband and his girlfriend and old fears of the devil and demons surfaced. My inner psyche was clearly purging deeper layers. But it was wasn’t scary, it was actually amazing. Thanks to the deeper healing work I’ve been doing the last few years and a greater connection to Spirit, as of all this came up, so did additional insights as well as greater levels of love, healing, and understanding. The Divine was literally shifting my perspective. I suddenly felt freer than ever before.
The Code Plants a Seed and Provides Me With a Clue
The next little Sacred Messenger occurred when I stumbled upon The Moses Code on gaia.com. The premise of the video is that when Moses asked God its name it said I AM THAT I AM and what was missing was a comma. The phrase I AM THAT I AM then becomes I AM THAT, I AM. If you say this slowly as you look around you, you’ll see how this shifts your perspective a bit. For me it affirmed that I am everything I see and experience. I am that …and that … and that. Everything, no exceptions. It’s easy to feel this when I’m looking at butterflies and birds, but not so easy when I’m looking at a child molester or a murderer.
My new friend Debbie Wryes was the next Sacred Messenger when she told me about a beautiful poetic book she had just finished called Crescendo. It’s written by Amy Weiss, a talented author, licensed clinical social worker, and the daughter of the psychotherapist and past life regressionist, Dr. Brian Weiss.
I finished the last pages of the book this morning and immediately gave it this 5-star review on amazon.com:
A Breathtaking Work of Art and Soul: It’s difficult to put into words the depths and heights this book took me to. As a past life regressionist and ACIM student, this book somehow brought to crisp beautiful life my belief and view of our experience here on earth and beyond as spiritual beings. I deeply ached through the grief and wept through the love. I finally saw with greater clarity that love is even inside grief, inside everything, it’s really all there is … just love expressing its soul in a million, billion ways. This book is a breathtaking work of art and soul.”
As you can see by my review I was deeply moved by this book. It’s gorgeous to read, poetically written with an musical theme that is beautifully woven throughout the book. And chalk full of gems that sparkle and resonate, such as:
“She had been wrong about songs of loss. There are no such things. It is not possible to lose someone when he is you. And it is not possible to lose yourself when you are everywhere.”
“But there is too much focus on this, on this differentiating. As if there were any distinction between stone and cell and song, between man and molecule. As if they weren’t a single soul in a single moment experiencing a single life in innumerable ways. As if the point of evolution were to branch off into many, rather than to find the way back to the one.”
“She had been wrong about love songs too. They are not what you sing when you have found another person., but when you have found one of the million missing pieces of yourself.”
The book ends with its own building crescendo and that crescendo created a crack in my heart….
My Heart Breaks Open on a Walk
After finishing the book this morning, I got dressed and took my dog Sienna out for her walk. As I was walking, the phrase “I AM THAT, I AM” resurfaced. It tied so beautifully with Crescendo’s message. I am everything I see, in every single moment. I am that pretty little butterfly. I am that dead and sadly smooshed turtle. I am that lush green tree. I am the clouds. I am the empty bottles and cans that people leave on this beautiful path. I am the smiling man and his tail-wagging puppy golden retriever that stops to say hello to Sienna. I am the smile. I am the puppy’s open hearted friendliness. I am the paved path I walk on. I am the crow calling overhead. I am the dragonfly that flies in front me. I am all of that. And it is me.
And then I felt it… my heart cracked wide open. I had to stop walking because tears were blurring my vision. I felt indescribable waves of connection with everything around me. No separation. Only LOVE mirroring itself back at me in a million different ways.
It is my deepest wish that you too know and experience the love that you are today.
The Truth About Taking Flight In New Directions
For years now, I had been yearning to live life in flow with Spirit. Less force, more grace. Less striving, more yielding. Less left brain analytical planning and more right brain intuitive receptivity. Less distraction, more connection. And much more working from intuition and heeding the messages that Spirit sends through the Universe, its people, the earth, animals, and more.
On a Wing and a Prayer…
I’ve read about people who reach for a different way of doing things …they chuck their demanding day jobs and relocate to the country to start an organic farm or a bakery. It sounds peaceful, blissful even. This has not been my experience, at least not right away. I am not financially wealthy, so when my intuition said it was time to move to the ocean, I sold my Harley, all my lovely furniture and household goods, left a few things in storage with a friend, and headed to the east coast with my dog, cat and only what would fit in my SUV. I have very limited savings. I commenced this journey on a wing and prayer, as they say (hence the worry).
I had no specific destination or plan, just a general feeling that somewhere between Savannah and Virginia Beach might be “the spot.” I spent a month on the road and eventually was led, via intuition, signs and dreams, to settle in the Outer Banks of North Carolina. The words that best describe how I’ve felt over the past four months, in no particular order are: exhilarating, scared, expansive, strong, worried, free, crazy, brave, lonely, called, open, supported by Spirit, and deeply grateful.
Gaining Focus & Altitude…
If this spiritual quest hasn’t been all peaches and cream, why didn’t I give up and go home to Sedona or New Hampshire? I came across an article on Facebook by Chip Richards, entitled the “The Four Stages of Spiritual Growth” that helps explain this urge inside me and where I’m at on my spiritual journey. There are four stages to how we experience the events in our lives: To Me, By Me, Through Me, and As Me. While ultimately I want to reach stage four, I believe I’m experiencing stage three, “through me.” He says in stage three,
We must be willing to let go of our need for control. As we let go of having to be the soul generator and controller of each outcome, we open ourselves up to discover a new sense of trust and connectedness to the bigger story/currents/song ready to flow through us.
For me it’s about learning to let go of control and trust my intuition and Spirit, to a much larger degree then ever before. It’s also about needing/wanting to allow guidance from Spirit to move and work through me for my highest good and the greater good of all. As the A Course in Miracles (ACIM) suggests, I pray to Spirit every day,
What would You have me do?
Where would You have me go?
What would You have me say, and to whom?
And, when inspiration and insight come to me suggesting a particular step, I do my best to take action and move in that direction.
Learning to Soar…
When the I think about the last four months, they have actually been EASY! I have been guided to the people and places that are for my highest good. Any worries or doubts that I had along the way were because I had leapt way out of my comfort zone. I was feeling the contrast between the known way (control/plan) versus the new way (intuit/flow).
I am ever so grateful for the curiosity and determination I’ve had to see it through. I have been generously rewarded. Spirit has gently and lovingly directed me. I now live in a cute little apartment in the maritime forest of Kitty Hawk, NC. As a country-girl at heart, I love the woods and the lovely 2-mile walking path that Siena and I enjoy most days. The beach is a short half mile bike ride over the bypass. Some days on my way home from work, I stop and walk the beach looking for shells or just sit, listening to the waves, and take in the ocean’s vast beauty. On weekends, I port my kayak three miles south and meander my way to the Sound among the clicking sounds of sea grass and the call of red winged black birds.
My lovely and affordable office space is an easy 12 mile drive on the bypass to Oasis Day Spa & Salon, in Kill Devils Hills, NC. The women I work among are sweet and caring. I have found a wonderful, eclectic spiritual tribe here. I’m making new friends. My work is expanding. More people and clients are finding their way to me. I have been thanked at least half dozen times for moving here. They say, “We so needed someone like you that does what you do!” I smile and say thank you!
Am I in the right place on my soul’s journey? Yes, I believe I am.
If you are interested in working with me for life coaching and healing, please call/text (603) 642-4949 or email Natalie@WisdomWithinOBX.com. My services include Heart & Soul coaching, Reiki energy healing, Belief Buster hypnosis, and intuitive readings. All work is intuitively based and guided.
About Eagle Medicine
Eagles have appeared to me several times since moving to the Outer Banks. Most locals are surprised when I share this because they’ve yet to see them! The eagle has also frequently been showing up in my personal oracle card work. Eagle encourages us to stretch our wings to reach new heights. Eagle embodies a higher perspective and leadership. It teaches us to conserve our energies and to use our energy for the greatest good. Eagle bridges both air and earth, bringing messages to and from the Divine.
Wisdom Within Blog
- Today My Heart Cracked Wide OpenWhen your heart breaks open it’s an indescribable experience. It’s almost impossible to put into words. Almost, I say because there’s a book that did an amazing job doing just that. I’ll tell you a little about that book plus I’m going to share a story about how the Divine helped me get to this new level of heart opening. Both are oh so beautifully tied together. It began with little Sacred Messengers showing up in my life, like bread crumbs leading to the ginger > Click article title to read more
- The Eagle Has Landed In the Outer BanksThe Truth About Taking Flight In New Directions For years now, I had been yearning to live life in flow with Spirit. Less force, more grace. Less striving, more yielding. Less left brain analytical planning and more right brain intuitive receptivity. Less distraction, more connection. And much more working from intuition and heeding the messages that Spirit sends through the Universe, its people, the earth, animals, and more. On a Wing and a Prayer… I’ve read about people who reach > Click article title to read more
- Why You Need to Go Outside When StressedHere’s why you need to go outside when you’re feeling stressed out or want to raise your energetic vibration. > Click article title to read more